Strong Women New Adventures

So I had an adventure yesterday.
As most of you or as I should say the two people who read this know I am pregnant. I am indeed 7 months along and I am having trouble seeing what we will call in this blog my VaJayJay. So to see my VaJJ I have to bend way over and it is uncomfortable. As you can imagine Landscaping this area is even more of a struggle which involves a mirror, a yoga stance, and a razor held very close to my VaJJ.

Well for the past few weeks my hubby I decided to grow out the lawn and see what happens. My hubby is gone on deployment so I can go hippy style for a while. I started noticing in-grown hairs and itching because it has been a while since the lawn has not been mowed.

Yesterday I was fed up and thought I would try something new, Waxing. I had in the past discussed this new idea with a friend who said she had been brave enough and that this didn’t hurt too badly. I have had my brows waxed before and it hurts for a second but then the pain is gone. I am also about to give birth and wanted to know what my pain tolerance was and if I am indeed a sissy or a tough woman.

So I go in and the small Asian lady is getting the wax ready. I ask will this hurt? She says in her little Asian tone, if you relax it hurt less so just relax. I am laying there spread eagle letting a little Asian lady dissect my VaJJ and I am supposed to relax knowing that in a few seconds she is going to put hot wax on my very sensitive area.

She begins her task and the first few were not that bad. I could feel the warm wax which was not bad and then the strip was placed and then I braced myself for the rip! When she got further and further down into her task that is when I thought to myself I wonder how many more? I wonder if I am bleeding? I wonder if I will have any skin left? What will happen if I get her to stop now and not finish? All of these thoughts went through my head.

Next thoughts of the Forty Year Old Virgin movie came across my mind. Thoughts of Steve Carell yelling “Lindsey Lohan” after the wax lady pulled the hair off his chest. I could see every comedy movie and tv show I had ever watched where some idiot thought it would be a good idea to rip hair off their body only to find out it HURT LIKE HELL! They would scream and the audience all laughed…yea why didn’t I think of that before I decided to pay this little Asian lady for this? Why would anyone pay for this type of torture?

Well I survived without punching her, yelling any profanities, or flinching too much. I guess I am strong enough to be considered a woman. Now I have a well landscaped area that I have to use a mirror to see and I have no one to show it to.

Women are crazy. No man would go through that amount of pain for beauty. I guess I will see just how tough I am when I have this baby in 2 months. Men definitely would not reproduce if they had to go through labor.

So I give a big high five to all the strong women out there.